


Light a flame for me

by superblykeen



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Chicago Blackhawks, M/M, Pittsburgh Penguins, Team Canada
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-08-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 00:43:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7736446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superblykeen/pseuds/superblykeen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The bi-annual tournament was supposed to be fun. Instead, Sidney and Jonathan find themselves treading through the forest on the brink of winter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Light a flame for me

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote the vast majority of this on very slow days at work. I might be a little ashamed. 
> 
> Any comments/criticism on the writing is much appreciated. Hope you enjoy!

“We should stay off the main path. I don’t want us to be spotted by bandits.”

“There is a perfectly paved road for civilians right here. I don’t plan to be covered in mud or mauled by bears.”

“You barely got any mud past your ankles and bears don’t live here. Anyway, Sir Mario always said to ---”

“Do you always do what you’re told?”

“If it keeps me alive.”

Jonathan narrowed his eyes at Sidney before he let out an exaggerated huff and stomped back into the forest. Sidney followed with his lips quirked up.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Every squire in the land looked forward to attending the bi-annual tournament. The opportunity to glimpse famed knights was rare in such a vast land. As well, no squire would admit to being a gossip, but exchanging tales with other travellers was a highlight of the event.

For Jonathan, the tournament didn’t feel special. It was held at Fort Winnipeg, only a few days’ ride away from his residence at the Grand Forks Palace. His father had arranged for him to be the squire to a distant cousin. While this was a good opportunity to learn essential skills of combat and the court, Sir Timothy was only a few years older than Jonathan, and Jonathan felt doubly embarrassed when spoken to like a young boy in the presence of famed knights.

Nevertheless, Jonathan befriended squires from across the land, though none made him as wary as Sidney. He was quiet, but he was always watching those around him. Jonathan prided himself on his observance, but even he felt exposed under Sidney’s eyes.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On the third day of the tournament, the highly anticipated jousting tournament was underway in the central field.

Among the audience members were Jonathan and Sir Timothy, avid spectators of the sport themselves. Jonathan spotted Sidney a few rows down, seated next to Sir Mario. Sir Mario was one of the most highly praised knights of the land, having proved his resilience and loyalty to the crown through injury and illness. He was oft relied upon by the King himself.

The audience members hushed as mounted knights awaited the signal to charge. As suspense hung in the air, a startling scream pulled Jonathan out of his focus. Jonathan turned to Sir Timothy for direction, but he was just as confused, trying to locate the source of the growing chaos.

Armed men flooded into the central field. Sir Timothy instructed Jonathan to find safe cover as the knights in the stands unsheathed their swords.

Running down the stands, he passed by an agitated Sidney. Jonathan was suspicious, but he wasn’t heartless. He grabbed Sidney’s arm and dragged him across the central field to a shed, avoiding flailing weapons in the carnage that had spread in minutes.

After barricading the door, the boys collapsed against the wall. Jonathan wrapped his arms more tightly around his knees upon hearing the sound of the unsettling shouts bleeding through the walls. Sidney pried Jonathan’s fists open and pressed their fingers together.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Creeping out of the shed, Sidney and Jonathan were met with an eerie scene of bodies uncannily strung across the field. If Sir Timothy was among the bodies in the castle, it would take days to find him, and Fort Winnipeg was assuredly not a safe place to stay for two unarmed boys.

“Where will you go?”

Where does anybody go when they’re scared and weary?

“Home.”

Home was little over a week’s journey on foot for Jonathan, but Sidney had travelled for close to a month on horse from Pittsburgh Castle.

“You should come with me. You can send a message in our pigeon coop once you arrive. It isn’t safe here.”

Sidney nodded in acknowledgement. Jonathan found him a little off-putting, but the two often agreed in matters of practicality.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Was this your first attendance at the tournament?”

Jonathan was walking in front of Sidney along the road, and stopped to turn and look at him. It was an oddly casual question to ask in desperate times.

Sidney was rubbing his arms to warm up against the chilly autumn air. It was perilous to return to the squires’ quarters to retrieve their belongings, so the boys had proceeded on their journey with nothing but the threadbare clothes on their backs.

“Don’t underestimate this weather. There is a possibility I could die on this journey. I’d rather that I did so in the presence of a friend.”

Jonathan rolled his eyes.

“I appreciate your logical thought, Sidney, but for goodness’ sake, don’t be so morbid. We’re not going to die. You’ve been camping with Sir Mario, haven’t you? You’re capable enough to survive a few days in the wilderness.”

Jonathan continued onward.

“If I hadn’t known you before, I would have thought that you were trying to be encouraging.”

“I can be encouraging.”

“Not with those eyes, you can’t.”

“What about my eyes?”

“The other squires say your eyes are murderous.”

“Then next time I commit murder I’ll have to remember to change my eyes.”

Jonathan heard Sidney cackle closely behind him. So Sidney does laugh.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“What is that?”

“Uh...a spear?”

“That is the least threatening spear I have ever seen. Give me that.”

Sidney yanked the makeshift weapon from Jonathan’s hand. He had spent quite some time sharpening the branch with some stones and was frankly a little offended. Sidney took a penknife out of his pocket and sat on a log to sharpen the tip.

“Well, that’s hardly fair. You had a knife and you didn’t tell me?”

“You never told me you were working on a spear. I was looking for food.”

“Did you find any?”

“No, it’s too cold for many of the edible plants to survive, and most of the mushrooms look suspicious. We’ll need to hunt.”

“Ah, so my spear was not for naught.”

“But your blunt spear was for naught.”

“Shut up, Sidney.”

Sidney looked down with a smile and continued working.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“How about some rabbit tonight?”

“Do we have options?”

“Not really. I just wanted to make it seem like we did.”

“Well, then, rabbit it is.”

The boys remained sitting until they realized the other had not stood up yet.

“The sun is setting soon, Jonathan.”

“Sidney, I’m always the one who hunts.”

“Because I’m a terrible hunter.”

“You’re just easily charmed by animals.”

“Perhaps that is so, which is precisely why you are more fit for the job.”

Sidney had a way of trapping Jonathan into corners. But it was not mean-spirited. Sidney would only ask Jonathan to do something if he genuinely felt that he was the better candidate, and hardly because Sidney was lazy. Being the squire to one of the most relied-upon knights of the land, there was no way Sidney would have been able to keep up without being hard-working.

“Then you have to set up the fire.”

“I always do that.”

“Get to it then.”

Jonathan slaps Sidney hard on the back.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wandering through the forest, Jonathan heard sounds of running water.The idea of eating fish instead of rabbit for the third night in a row was very appealing. The current was moving rather fast, but braving the waters for a decent dinner would be a rewarding feat. Jonathan took off his jacket and shirt before stepping into the water.

Jonathan waded across the river in search of fish that wouldn’t scurry away. He missed his footing and was sent tumbling in the flow of the strong current.

Jonathan could swim, but being taken off guard in a quick river was frightening. In a moment of desperation, disoriented in the rapids, Jonathan cried out.

“Sidney!”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sidney had been making good progress collecting firewood. He was heading back to their campsite when he heard a loud echo.

Jonathan and Sidney hadn’t heard many animal cries (despite Jonathan’s insistence that the forest reeked of bears), so Sidney had dismissed any thoughts of danger.

However, Jonathan usually made it a habit to return to the campsite before the sun had set. The sky was already reddening, so Sidney decided it would be safer to retrieve his travel companion before it was too dark.

Walking in the general direction Jonathan had gone, Sidney stumbled upon Jonathan’s clothes. Noticing the rushing river just a few paces beyond, Sidney broke out into a run. He abruptly stopped along the riverbank upon sight of a figure lying face-down on a rock and jumped in immediately.

Sidney carefully waded back to the bank with Jonathan slumped over him. A large bruise was forming at his temple, and there were some gashes and scrapes on his shoulders and arm. Sidney slapped Jonathan a few times on the cheek, but Jonathan’s eyes stayed closed.

Sidney’s chest tightened. At the onset of their journey, Sidney was seriously considering the possibility of death. In an ironic twist, it might be Jonathan who would never wake up again.

Sidney tended to Jonathan’s wounds. In the chance that Jonathan would recover, he wouldn’t want his wounds to be infected. Sidney ripped a few strips of cloth off his shirt to wrap as bandages. The knots looked messy, but they did the job. Sidney had graver issues in mind.

Sidney pressed on the bruise at Jonathan’s temple, triggering Jonathan to scrunch his face and wince at the pain. He cracked open his eyes and stared incredulously into Sidney’s eyes before sitting up.

“Sidney?”

“Yes, Jonathan.”

Sidney stroked his palm down Jonathan’s frigid back. Jonathan looked down guiltily, but Sidney felt no anger, only relief that his friend was alive. Hurt, but alive. Nobody needed to know that Sidney was mourning loss of a friend just minutes earlier.

Back at the campsite, the firewood had been collected, so Sidney needed only to start the fire. It was too dark to resume hunting, so the two sat by the fire drying their clothes.

Sidney put out the fire as Jonathan felt his eyelids dropping. Instead of lying down to sleep, he sat next to Jonathan. Stretching an arm over Jonathan’s chest, Sidney nudged him to lie down. They fell asleep with nothing in their stomachs, but the warmth of each other would carry them through the night.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’ll look for our food tonight. You start the fire.”

“Are you sure?”

“You’re hurt.”

“I’m hardly hurt. My arms and legs are fully capable.”

“Just do what you’re told, Jonathan.”

“You’re not that much older than me.”

“Old enough to know better than you.”

Sidney stalked into the woods.

Sidney was indubitably a responsible person, but Jonathan had never been on the receiving end of his care. Jonathan would never admit it, but he appreciated this side of Sidney.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You never answered my question.”

“About what?”

“Whether it was your first time at the tournament.”

“I wanted to go to the spring tournament, but Sir Timothy thought that I was still too young.”

Sidney snorted.

“I’m sure you were more mature at ten years old than I am now.”

“I’m not sure whether to take that as a compliment.”

“If it makes you feel better.”

“And you?”

“It was my first tournament as well. When I was younger, Sir Mario wanted me to focus on my training.”

Sidney had a fond smile that only showed when he spoke of Sir Mario.

“You really look up to him.”

“I do. He’s like a second father to me.”

Jonathan looked down.

“You know...there were a lot of bodies back at the castle...You have to consider the possibility.”

Jonathan peered at Sidney.

“I...I thought you were supposed to be the encouraging one.”

Sidney had a poor attempt at a playful smile on his lips, but the light in his eyes was gone completely.

Jonathan was being realistic and he knew Sidney would understand, but he still felt like a bully.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sidney resumed his regular responsibility of gathering wood and starting the fire, without a word that late afternoon. When Jonathan returned with his kill, Sidney was not seated by the fire, but meandering in the nearby wooded area. Jonathan roasted and ate the rabbit alone, and leaving half for Sidney who returned to the fire just as Jonathan was finished his portion.

Sidney and Jonathan were like-minded like that. Observant and effective. They could always figure out the intentions of others, and how to appropriately react to them. But their differences laid in Sidney’s distaste for confrontation and Jonathan’s itch to resolve issues.

Jonathan didn’t do anything wrong, per se, merely stating the truth, but he didn’t like to see Sidney upset. Sidney didn’t like showing weakness, but he couldn’t help but wallow in his worry for the loss of Sir Mario.

Jonathan leaned against a tree as Sidney finished his half and put out the fire.

They laid on opposite sides of the campfire, basking in the residual warmth in the air. Jonathan fell asleep fast, but he was also a light sleeper. His eyes opened to Sidney’s unnaturally deep breathing. Sidney was on his side, back towards the remnants of the fire. Jonathan crawled over, and briefly straddled Sidney before moving to look into his face.

Jonathan gently tugged at Sidney’s arms that were covering his face. He tucked his face into Sidney’s neck, and Sidney laid his arms loosely around Jonathan’s shoulders. Jonathan stroked his hands up and down Sidney’s back in apology while Sidney’s tears silently slid down his face.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“This will be a good winter.”

Jonathan rarely initiated conversations as odd as these, but he was becoming comfortable in Sidney’s presence.

“Why do you say that?”

“It will be very cold.”

“I hardly think that makes a good winter.”

“Well, I’ll let you in on a secret.”

“Pray tell, Jonathan.”

“I actually quite like winter.”

“Very treasonous, Jonathan. I may have to report you.”

Jonathan rolled his eyes at Sidney’s poor attempt at a joke.

“In the coldest winter evenings, my mother would tend to the hearth. My father would sit by, telling the most amusing stories to my brother and I. My favourite people, all sitting together by the fire.”

This memory was clearly dear to Jonathan’s heart. Sidney didn’t want to interrupt.

“Every fire would remind me of the family hearth.”

As Jonathan lifted his head, his eyes bore into Sidney’s own. Gentle, but direct as only Jonathan could be.

“But perhaps now I will also think of another face the next time I see a fire.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The boys walked out of the forest for the first time in days, surprised by a sheet of snow lying atop the meadow. An even more surprising sight appeared in the distance.

Heart brimming with relief, Jonathan strode towards the palace of his residence. But Sidney had not moved his feet. He chewed his lip nervously.

Sidney’s journey with Jonathan had put his previous life in seeming suspension. In the past days, Sidney focused only on the worries of survival (perhaps thoughts of Jonathan drifted through his mind as well).

With the sight of civilization back in view, certain painful thoughts found their ways back into Sidney’s mind. The scene of the massacre at Fort Winnipeg, the thought of losing his mentor, the idea of leaving Jonathan so soon after being in his good graces (that was what Jonathan was talking about, right?). Sidney didn’t feel ready to confront his woes.

Sidney also had a habit of being lost in his thoughts and often needed awakening from his reveries. Just as Sidney did in the supply shed at Fort Winnipeg, Jonathan took Sidney’s hand, and led him across the white pasture, leaving fine imprints in the perfect snow.

The air was terrifyingly bleak, but the feeling of Sidney’s hand in his own was enough to warm Jonathan’s entire being.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was still light, so the palace gates were not yet shut for the night. Jonathan intended to lead Sidney straight to the kitchens, where they could sit in the warmth and perhaps bribe a cook for leftovers to ease their stomachs.

However, they were accosted by Lady Lauren, Sir Timothy’s wife, who created a huge fuss. First, she had been fearful that the boys had been killed in the attack in Winnipeg, and then terrified that they had caught chills in the snow. She sent servants off to draw some bathwater.

In the meantime, Sidney and Jonathan ran some quick errands.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jonathan was soaking in the bathwater when Sidney joined him in the squires’ quarters, plopping himself down on a stool.

“Did you send your letters?”

Sidney nodded.

“I wrote a letter to my family in Cole Harbour, and another to Pittsburgh Castle. Hopefully Sir Mario will send for me. If not, then maybe another of the knights will pity me and arrange to send me someplace else.”

Sidney slipped off his wet boots. The snow was light, but neither boy had prepared for the circumstances.

Jonathan relayed the information that Sir Timothy had gathered regarding the attack at Winnipeg, which was discovered to be a coup by a local Manitoban rebel group. The perpetrators were arrested, but the loss of men on both sides signalled the need for added security to the Fort.

Sidney had been politely looking out the window but was eager to jump into the bath after Jonathan had scrubbed himself clean. As he undressed, Jonathan noticed the bones jutting out in Sidney’s ribs, and the protruding knobs in his spine. Jonathan probably wasn’t much better, seeing as how little the two had to eat on their journey.

Sidney slipped into the bath and looked at Jonathan.

“You don’t have to stay here. I’m sure you’d like to speak with your friends.”

“If I leave you alone, you might drown.”

“Can’t you let me have all the glory that comes with rescuing someone from fearsome waters?”

Sidney smiled but Jonathan frowned. He was at home, but Sidney was still so far from his, and it felt wrong to leave him alone.

Sidney rested his arms on the ledge of the tub and propped his head up to look at Jonathan.

“You’re not indebted to me. You’re my friend now.”

Jonathan rested his elbows on his knees to lean closer to the tub.

“That may be so, but I like to show gratitude to my friends.”

Sidney couldn’t quite decipher Jonathan’s intention, and he felt vulnerable sitting naked in the tub.

“What are you trying to tell me?” Sidney whispered.

Jonathan angled his face to catch Sidney’s lips with his own and cradled the back of Sidney’s neck. Sidney grabbed onto the front of Jonathan’s shirt.

Jonathan had never relied on someone as he did with Sidney over the past days. He was certain that their co-dependency was a mere side-effect of the circumstances, but upon the close of their journey, it was clear that what Jonathan felt with Sidney was more than a bond of brotherhood.

Jonathan slid off from the stool and sat against the tub, leaning his head onto Sidney’s. They sat quietly until the sky turned pink and Sidney’s fingers thoroughly wrinkled.

Jonathan laughed and called Sidney and old man, but he helped wipe Sidney's back with a dry cloth.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sidney busied himself with mundane tasks over the next week at Grand Forks. Sweeping in the kitchen, feeding the horses, helping the laundry maids, anything to take his mind off of Pittsburgh Castle.

If he didn’t hear back, he would travel home to Cole Harbour. Jonathan hated to see Sidney go, but he could not keep Sidney from seeking new employ. Not when he was just as ambitious as Jonathan, eager to become a knight in his own right.

As the boys were fixing a wagon for Sir Timothy’s elder daughter, the young monk who tended to the messenger pigeons approached Sidney with a letter. Sidney was hesitant to take it, but Jonathan accepted and opened it as Sidney sat down in the wagon.

Jonathan crouched down and held the letter out so Sidney could see the seal on the letter.

“Sir Mario bids your return.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jonathan spent the next morning trying to swipe any leftover food while Sidney was laughing in the corner of the kitchen (so unhelpful, that ungrateful prat).

Sidney walked to the stables with a sack bulky with bread, and so, so many potatoes.

Grand Forks Palace agreed to lend a horse for Sidney’s travels with the mutual understanding that Pittsburgh would offer the same hospitality in times of need. Jonathan was a little in awe, that Sir Mario thought so highly of Sidney that his aid was worth the obligation.

“We can write each other, you know.”

Jonathan never thought himself much of a wordsmith.

“I’d be terrible at it.”

“You don’t have to write poetry.”

“Then it’d be awfully dull.”

“A perfect representation of the Jonathan that I know.”

After strapping his belongings onto the horse, Sidney slid his arms up Jonathan’s arms to wrap around his shoulders. Jonathan was becoming accustomed to Sidney’s shows of affection and cradled his arms tightly around Sidney’s back and leaned down to nose at Sidney’s shoulder. Sidney placed his hands along Jonathan’s jawline and give him a kiss on the lips, then the forehead.

Jonathan walked Sidney to the palace gates. If Jonathan touched Sidney again, he knew that he would be too attached to let go.

Sidney bid a final farewell to Jonathan from his horse, stroking his fingers through Jonathan’s hair at the crown of his head. And with a shining smile on his face, he trotted forward at a light pace.

Sidney never looked back, but Jonathan stood at the gates until nightfall.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sir Jonathan was surprised and elated to be summoned to Château Ottawa. Archduke Stephen of the Northern Archduchy was to host a summit, and sought the wisest, strongest, and most loyal knights to ensure a meeting free from conflict or physical threat.

He felt pride to have his efforts recognized by the Archduke, and Jonathan would find himself reunited with knights he had befriended in his youth. But none piqued his interest as Sir Sidney did.

Jonathan and Sidney had corresponded on an ongoing basis. Whenever Jonathan received Sidney’s letters, he would escape to the fields, imagining that Sidney lay next to him, voice soft in the wind, chattering about his day.

However, nothing compared to seeing the man standing in front of him.

“Sidney.”

Sidney had been washing his steed, and dropped his rag upon eye contact with Jonathan. Sidney had not yet outgrown his boyish looks, and Jonathan felt impossibly fond that his dear friend was now within reach after years apart.

Sidney had always thought of Jonathan as a boy just a little younger than him. However, cloaked with a regal red cape, sweat sheening on his face, and hair falling across his forehead, Sidney couldn’t describe Jonathan as anything other than dashing.

“Jonathan.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

During Archduke Stephen’s opening speech, Jonathan hooked his little finger into Sidney’s. They stood shoulder-to-shoulder behind seated guests, so Jonathan was unlikely to be caught. Sidney did not react, nor did he look at Jonathan, but he did not push away.

After the knights were dismissed, Sidney took Jonathan by his cape, and led him to the stables. He laid his head on Jonathan’s shoulder, and Jonathan’s heart ignited with a fiery but familiar warmth.


End file.
